You’re handing me money that came from there? Really?!

Baby feet = Adorable. Grown up feet, not so much.

Working in customer service, I have seen it all.  Or at least I thought I had.  I was brought up to be very respectful.  Lots of thank you, yes mam, just common courtesy.  Apparently other people didn’t receive the same lectures that my Mom and Dad used to give me.  I have dealt with some of the rudest, crudest, most thoughtless human beings.  Of course, we do have some of the greatest and most considerate people as well.  However, most of the time, the bad outweighs the good.   At least they make for some fun writing. 🙂

I was 20 when I took a job as a receptionist.  I had only worked with kids or in a copy center, so this was new to me.  About one month or so into the job, a client came in.  One I will never forget.  It was the middle of winter and she was dressed like she worked in a factory.  She asked me how much she owed, so I told her.  Next thing I know, she started removing her work boot.  She reached into her sock and handed me money.  She must have noticed the puzzled face I had on and the slight nose crinkle.  “I’m sorry it’s wet.  I’ve had it in there all day.  I had no other place to put it”  I didn’t even count it.  I hate feet.  Why would I touch a clients sweaty foot money!  I wouldn’t even touch my own sweaty foot money!   And why couldn’t she keep it in her jeans pocket!  Or invest in a darn fanny pack!  I literally had to let it dry.  Those bills were the first to go into the deposit bag that night.

I have also encountered armpit money.  Don’t worry if you don’t know what it is.  I’ll get into full detail here.  Armpit money is the money from which is pulled from ones armpit.  It’s typically sweaty, folded and gross.  Why it was in his armpit or why it was, I didn’t ask.  These are moments I wish amnesia would kick in.    This has happened more than once.  I wonder if he has a armpit pocket that is sold somewhere?   A pit pack instead of a fanny pack?  If not, maybe he should design one?  Or maybe I should design one and leave it at the corner of my desk for a free consolation prize.   Hmm, that may be my next project.

Bra money is another one.  Maybe a guy thinks it’s hot if you go to a bar or a club and you pull out a bill from your bra.  Maybe.  Trust me though, your insurance agent does not think that is hot.  It’s kind of awkward.  I’m handling money that was just in your bra.  Does that sound ok to you? 

I guess my point of this whole post is, where did common courtesy get lost?  When did people start thinking somebody wanted sweaty foot money or armpit money?  Why would somebody want to handle your bra money?  Does the thought even cross their mind?  Do they think it’s funny?  Either way, it gives me the creeps.  I must wash my hands 30 times a day.  Imagine where else it’s been?   Oh I can’t.  I can’t even believe I had to say that out loud.  Just gross, gross, gross!

If I can just reach out to one of you foot, bra or armpit culprits, I will feel as though I saved another person from suffering.  If you do this, please don’t.  If you see somebody do this, please tell them not to.  Ask them if they will consider a debit card.  Maybe offer them a spare wallet or fanny pack.

Please.  Do it for the money handlers of America.  Do it for me.   I would be forever grateful.




6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Bushlings
    Aug 29, 2011 @ 15:54:48

    Debit cards go in bras too. LOL! Down where I’m from they call it the “granny purse”


  2. Anthony
    Aug 29, 2011 @ 21:06:42

    Amazing as usual! Nothing grosses me out more than sweaty or wet money.


  3. Tracy
    Sep 02, 2011 @ 12:41:56

    That is so gross. I’ve seen older ladies pull money out of their bras but never foot money. My granny told me don’t put money in your mouth (not that I ever would have) its nasty. I tell my daughter the same thing.


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